As part of my looooooong deserved vacation, I spent 10 days in Kumasi, one of my dream places. I went to braid my hair in a small kiosk of a very pretty, respectful lady. The braiding took the whole afternoon and most of early evening. Though my hair didn’t come out the way I would have liked, I was struck by the braider’s beauty and her painstaking diligence in getting my hair done.
I noticed she had a Good News Bible tucked in her things but I didn’t comment on it. In Ghana today, it seems everybody is professing to be a Christian, or so I thought.
Late afternoon, a beautiful, fair-coloured lady, whom I will call Fair Lady, walked into the Lady Braider’s kiosk with tales of marriage ceremonies she had attended over the weekend, including her brother’s. In her rich, deep voice and with an aggressive attitude, Fair Lady lamented that she had attended countless marriage ceremonies over the years and especially so, this year. Thus by hook or crook, she too must get married in 2008, otherwise she might have to advise herself with regards to the current relationship she is in. She also alluded (this is the part that got my sensors fired up), that she needed to have a prophecy from a pastor/prophet so as to determine her marital status next year. I was both surprised and amused at the conversation between Fair Lady and Lady Braider. Lady Braider’s soft-spoken response, “Everything has its own time. Your time will come and you too will be married,” won my added admiration for her. Unfortunately, Fair Lady wasn’t comforted by these words and left the kiosk a few minutes later with the same belligerent attitude she came in with.
A few minutes later, wanting to revisit their earlier conversation, partly because I was in awe of her godly response to her friend and partly because I was just curious, I asked Lady Braider, “How old is your friend that she seems incredibly eager to get married?” My request for Fair Lady’s age was denied (In Ghana, age is considered confidential) but was given more information than I hoped for. (Now, I stand at risk of being accused of gossiping, but read on, Fair Lady and Lady Braider really do not concern me. It’s doubtful that I’d meet them again, ever. But the issues raised in their conversation, is what grabbed my attention.)
According to Lady Braider, (if the story is true) Fair Lady has a 6 year old child with a man, with whom she is currently living with and is providing him with all the “wifey” services. Oooh I see…. No wonder after all these years, the man doesn’t see the need to formalize the relationship and still doesn’t today. Now, it seems Fair Lady is fighting a battle in which she’s likely to loose. And now, she needs a prophecy to determine the future of her relationship.
So I commented that since Fair Lady had already gotten herself a “husband,” how could she expect God to provide the good and godly husband she now desires? And I have a feeling that this man is not motivated to marry her officially ‘cos she is already behaving like a wife. But then if the man is coerced to marry her (as Fair Lady’s attitude seems to portray) esp. without godly counsel, I can foresee avoidable problems in their marriage in the future.
I only wish Fair Lady would quit the relationship (I know it won’t be easy for her) and seek godly counsel. I also pray she would genuinely seek God, Himself and not just a “prophecy” to fix her relationship problems or to determine her marital status in the coming year.
Not that I’ve been in this situation before nor am I married; none of the above. Lady Braider also appears to be unmarried, but we both did and do acknowledge that waiting for and on God is the Best.
And know what I found out just about when my hair was done? Lady Braider’s signboard reads: God’s Time Beauty Centre. What an extraordinary, circumstantial reminder on an ordinary day.